My Decision

I've been thinking for the past few weeks about rejoining the SE forum. I haven't looked in there, just so everyone knows. I've stayed out because I wanted the decision to go back there to remain solely on my own. I know some peeps wanted me to return, and as much as I thank those people who want me back, and appreciate their support, I didn't want my choice to be influenced in any way.

Anyway, I have decided not to return. Sorry to those who asked me to come back. I'm not ready to go back. The final choice was made when an incident on YouTube happened. I blew up at someone. Not that that person didn't deserve it! I mean, he attacked me, and several other people commenting on a video and his attacks were completely uncalled for! In my defense, it was late at night and I was very tired that night when I replied to him. Usually I always try to keep my cool even in the face of people like that, and this past year I've been attempting to reform. But that night I just totally lost it. I usually only get angry at people who make threats over the internet, and repeat offenders. But I didn't even know this guy, or what flew up his butt that night.

This is why I don't like arguing and fighting. I always feel bad afterwards because sometimes I tend to go overboard. Though I have learned to monitor it this past year. I didn't want to return to any forums really until I learn to completely keep my cool. That is, not reply to the trolls and idiots. And we all know there is a big troll on the SE forum, and he knows whom he is! Anyway, I want to get to a point where I can read his posts and not get angry at him, because I could lose it again, especially when I see that jerk shit-talk someone I like or force his opinions on others without providing proof!! Both of which he is infamous for doing. Anyway, I want to make sure when I go in there, I don't blow up at anyone for any reason. That guy on Youtube, I was saying afterwards that I wish I hadn't blown up at him, just because I am trying to keep from doing that now. But maybe it's all for the better, it told me that I am not ready to go back to any forum.

Should I Or Not?

As you can see, I haven't posted much on this blog, I've been so terribly busy. Been 2 months since I posted anything here, and quite a while since I've done anything on my Metazoic site. So much has gone on in the past few months. I have been quite well rewarded now, I have a new little girl in my life, Minnie. She is the highlight of my being now. She's not a young dog but she still has a lot of good years left in her, she's almost 4 years old, and I think she came from a puppymill. She seems to never have lived in a house, and she's shy about being touched, even in a positive way. So I have quite a job ahead of me training her. She's a beautiful girl!! She's not a chihuahua like my others, she's a papillon, and an ex-breeder and I think she just had a litter recently because she is blowing her coat something fierce!!! It could be that and the fact that it was 100 degrees this past week at her old home in Olympia! Well, believe me when I say the summers here are cooler. Last week, while Olympia was experiencing 100 degree temperatures, we've been enjoying temperatures around 68-70 degrees. I love it here!!! I'm so glad I finally got to move out here. Well, I've had Minnie for 3 days now, and her shedding has lessened considerably.

Anyway, for the real reason I started this post. I'm debating whether to go back to the SE forum or not. I heard from another member and they want me back. That makes 2 people now who have asked me to return. But I am not sure I want to. I didn't enjoy it much the last time I was there, they seemed more interested in talking about video games than speculative evolution. And video games are not my thing. Then there is the thing about the owner being a jerk the last time I was there. That probably won't change! I'm usually a damn good judge of character, and I thought he was a good person, but he proved me wrong. He blows his top over minor little things, and I just won't tolerate it. What promise do I have he won't do it again? Ever since I left there, I've been trying to go for a change in personality myself, and if I go back, it'd be just as bad as if I were to return to the Pluba forums. To make a long story short, one of the most popular people on the Pluba forum is also one of the worst people I've ever met on the internet, and she is a manipulator who associates with people who hack into other people's computers. One of her friends hacked into an old Hotmail account I used to have, and she claimed she knew nothing about it. But I can tell you for sure, she DID!!!

Then there is the morale of the people on the SE forum. I'm not saying the people I still like on that forum are like that, but a lot of the people on that forum seem to have been led to believe JohnFaa and Viergacht are good people and I just don't agree with that. Right after I left, JohnFaa was still griping about me on that forum, and when I gave him the same thing on this blog, he shit his pants and went back to the SE forum and his own blog and played the martyr, saying to everyone that I hassled him first, which was totally untrue. And everyone there (except for the few sensible ones) believed him. And Viergacht is just a lunatic! Though Katrina and I have a $50 bet going with each other about how long it would take Viergacht to put me on ignore if I were to go back to the SE forum. She says he'll put me on ignore within the first day, I say within the first 5 minutes! hehe! I know his type, he acts tough online, but he couldn't handle Katrina, and he blocked her from his journal. She wasn't even mean to him, she just told it like it is! Really though if the majority of the people on that forum want to believe those two are "good" people and I am not, that's their business! But I don't trust them at all, and a forum that accepts loonies like those, I have no business being in there. Again, I'm a good judge of character, I have rarely been wrong, I know bad news when I see it.

I'll tell you, any time you hear a grown person hassling children, using the word "retard" or "retarded", or making fun of fat people, those are the types of people you know you can't trust at all! I know through personal experience. I've lived long enough to see a great number of those kinds of people wind up in jail---or in a serious court case at least, hehe. It's got nothing to do with the name-calling really. But it's the lack of morale those people have. And I don't want to go down that path of destruction again. I've toned down considerably since I met Metalraptor. I admit I have a long way to go, but I'm getting there slowly but surely. If I join the SE forum again, I'd just be throwing all that I've worked for this past year away. I made a promise when I decided to go for a change, that I wouldn't join anymore forums. At least not until I know I've changed and I can hold on to that more rational behavior. Though I know no matter where I go, I'm going to come across people I don't like or just don't trust that's just how humans are! But still... ya know.

My life has been so busy anyways, I've been doing things for the UMG Productions site, still planning a promotional tour. I just finished a book of more than 500 pages for the site, all about the different breeds of dogs. I've also been working on the same kind of thing, only about the different breeds of horses. Horses are my second love, besides dogs. I have a couple of horses, but they are currently living with Katrina, who has some acreage for them to run around and graze. I don't have that kind of acreage now so they cannot stay with me and I miss them!! I've never written a book about horses before. But I have written about 5 dog books in my life! The very first I wrote when I was in 5th grade, and I had just begun to study dogs. I also wrote one in middle school. Then I wrote one right after I finished high school. Then in 2000 I wrote one again, I printed it but I never published it. Then this year, I made an updated version of the book I wrote in 2000 and this time I did publish it.

Well, that all has been going on, and so has the deal with INXS--my favorite rock group. Seems they are in muddy waters right now and I do feel bad for them. But I remain loyal. When I really like something or someone, I remain loyal forever. I just hope this does not mean the end of INXS's career. Then I guess I must join the ranks of Beatles fans that still love them, but know they will never see them whole again. I don't want that to happen to INXS, and it does kinda worry me that it might. I mean, a lot of former fans have turned against them because of this new project they have been working on. I say let's see what happens first before we make any harsh judgments. I'm not giving up on them, and I'm sure they appreciate the fans who will always be loyal to them. In fact I know they do.

Anyhow, I don't think I will be returning to the SE forum. But anyone who wants to discuss speculative evolution with me or Metalraptor, please feel free to send your discussions to me here or through e-mail. Metalraptor knows a lot more than I do about this, but I can do a little bit of good speculation, based on what I know and what I have learned.

Anyway, for your entertainment, here's some pics I took of Minnie. She'll look a lot better once her coat comes in again. Once that happens, I think Minnie might be a good show potential! I was studying AKC's version of the papillon breed standard, and she's got almost all--except for the long, flowing coat!

I got Vegas in this one. You can just see him on the ground. He still hasn't got used to Minnie being here.