My Decision

I've been thinking for the past few weeks about rejoining the SE forum. I haven't looked in there, just so everyone knows. I've stayed out because I wanted the decision to go back there to remain solely on my own. I know some peeps wanted me to return, and as much as I thank those people who want me back, and appreciate their support, I didn't want my choice to be influenced in any way.

Anyway, I have decided not to return. Sorry to those who asked me to come back. I'm not ready to go back. The final choice was made when an incident on YouTube happened. I blew up at someone. Not that that person didn't deserve it! I mean, he attacked me, and several other people commenting on a video and his attacks were completely uncalled for! In my defense, it was late at night and I was very tired that night when I replied to him. Usually I always try to keep my cool even in the face of people like that, and this past year I've been attempting to reform. But that night I just totally lost it. I usually only get angry at people who make threats over the internet, and repeat offenders. But I didn't even know this guy, or what flew up his butt that night.

This is why I don't like arguing and fighting. I always feel bad afterwards because sometimes I tend to go overboard. Though I have learned to monitor it this past year. I didn't want to return to any forums really until I learn to completely keep my cool. That is, not reply to the trolls and idiots. And we all know there is a big troll on the SE forum, and he knows whom he is! Anyway, I want to get to a point where I can read his posts and not get angry at him, because I could lose it again, especially when I see that jerk shit-talk someone I like or force his opinions on others without providing proof!! Both of which he is infamous for doing. Anyway, I want to make sure when I go in there, I don't blow up at anyone for any reason. That guy on Youtube, I was saying afterwards that I wish I hadn't blown up at him, just because I am trying to keep from doing that now. But maybe it's all for the better, it told me that I am not ready to go back to any forum.